Hermione's Misadventures in Lust
by ancientsgirl91
Summary: This story takes you through the ups and downs of Hermione's sex life, from her first time to her kinkiest fantasies. Mostly lemon/smut/whatever you want to call it. Read, and enjoy ;  Hermione/Ron, Hermione/Draco, Hermione/a lot of other people.


Hermione Granger's 19th birthday was the most awkward day of her life.

It started out fine, although she woke up way too late to be content, and her mother burnt her toast, and her father started to get really sentimental, and Crookshanks was still hiding from her, and Ron wasn't owling her back, and Harry was stuck in London with Ginny for the weekend.

But yeah, other than that it was a wonderful morning.

Hermione usually woke up at 7 o'clock every morning, no matter what. Weekends, weekdays, days where she didn't have to work, no matter. She has an internal alarm clock that made sure she was up at seven, every single morning. Except for on her birthday, of course. No she woke up at 9 o'clock on her birthday.

It was the direction of the sun that did it. They way it shone down straight into her eyelids and colored them red woke her right up. There was a fuzzy taste in her mouth and she could feel those disgusting crusties in the corners of her eyes. She had to rub at her eyes for a few minutes before she could actually read her alarm clock, and when she could finally see the time she panicked.

Jumping out of bed she threw on a pair of half-clean jeans and a hoodie lying on her floor and tore down the stairs to the kitchen. She sounded like an elephant and her mother had no problem telling her that.

"Hermione you sound like an elephant when you stomp like that. I wish you wouldn't."

Hermione just mumbled something, not in the mood for her mother's lectures today. Did she even remember that is was her daughter's birthday?

"Oh and happy birthday dear. I made you some toast."

It seems as though she did remember.

"Thanks Mom."

Hermione grumbled some more as she saw the black edges of her toast. She never understood how someone could always burn the toast, no matter how many times she tried. Her mother did try, a lot, but the toast always looked disgusting and tasted even worse. Hermione tried to think of a nice way to skip the toast, but was saved the stress when her father walked in to the kitchen, holding a newspaper and an empty teacup.

"Good morning sweetheart. Happy 19th birthday. How is my little birthday girl?"

He sat down beside her at the table and patted her on the head like it was her 5th birthday, not her 19th. Sometimes Hermione wondered if the memory spell on her parents had actually done some permanent damage or if they were just always this annoying.

Hermione decided to zone out as her father reminisced about how much she had grown and how proud he was of the young woman she had become. She really was not in the mood to deal with all of his mushy crap. When he seemed to be slowing down she found an excuse to leave the kitchen and owl Ron again.

"I have to pee."

Well no one said it was a very classy excuse.

Once she got back upstairs to her room she wrote out a quick note to Ron and attached to her new owl's leg. The not read:

_Dearest Ronald,_

_I really wish you would owl me back. I have sent you five letters and have received none in return. I understand you are either too busy snoring or stuffing something in your face, but I really would appreciate knowing what is going on tonight._

_Yours affectionately,_

_Hermione_

She believed it to be straight to the point while still leaving an air of romance. She had no patience for Ron and his lazy, sloppy tendencies, but she did like him a lot. Maybe she even loved him. She didn't want to think about that though.

As she waited on her bed for news from Ron she let her mind drift back to all her moments with him. She thought about how awkward it was at the beginning, he would turn beet red while just holding her hand, but it had started getting better recently. They had only been dating a few months but after knowing each other for so long it was easier to get the hang of things.

After they first kissed during the Battle of Hogwarts, Hermione thought every kiss would be like that. She was wrong. There wasn't that kind of passion in their kisses, the romantic moment when they knew they may die and everything was so much more intense. Everything now just felt watered down.

The few times Ron and Hermione actually got close to having sex there was an excuse not to do it. The first time, after Hermione had taken her shirt off and Ron started to unzip his pants, Hermione halted the motions when she realized she didn't know the contraception spell. The next time, after she had figured the spell out, Ron realized he had an interview to go to. The most recent time was because Harry had almost walked in on them.

Awkward.

Now she was thinking about tonight. Ron said he had a surprise for her birthday, and Hermione had an inkling. Her inklings were usually correct. She was pretty sure tonight was the night she would actually lose her virginity.

Hermione wasn't a typical teenage girl, everyone knows that. She helped bring down the darkest wizard known to man alongside her two best friends all before her 19th birthday. She was nowhere near ordinary, but she had her moments. She would daydream about her future, who she would marry, what her children would look like, if she was _ever_ going to actually have sex.

She had been thinking a lot about sex lately, and she thought it may have something to do with how innocent she had been her whole life. Everything was catching up to her now and it basically body slammed her. She was horny all the time. Like, _all_ the time.

_*Flashback*_

Hermione knew about masturbating but hadn't actually tried it until her 6th year, when it seemed that everyone was getting some except for her. She had read about it online one night and thought she should really try it. She made sure her curtains were sealed around her bed and cast a silencing charm, worried she might make a few noises and wake her roommates.

She was wearing only a t-shirt and shorts since it was just late summer and the rooms got very warm with the windows closed. She felt extremely exposed as she slipped her underwear down over her knees and looped around her ankles. Hermione laid there for a moment, feeling the breeze between her legs and getting slightly nervous about what she was about to do. What if she was terrible? What if she didn't know what to do? What if she was a freak and her body didn't work? Hermione was in full on panic mode.

Figuring it was the only way to correct the situation she placed her hand on her mound, tickling the little hairs that were at the top of her slit. She knew where her clit was (after studying the human anatomy on her computer and making sure she understood everything) but she was afraid to touch it. She knew that once she did there would be no turning back.

Giving in to temptation she let her middle finger slide between her warm folds, not yet lubricated from her arousal. The tip of her finger touched her sensitive bud for just a second but that was all it took for Hermione to know that this was going to be good.

Already she started to get wet as she twirled her finger around, figuring out where all the sensitive spots were. She felt the moisture sloshing around her finger tip and enjoyed the creamy consistency of it. At she got more and more turned on she added her ring finger and made smaller circles with both her fingers, centered right on her bud.

Feeling daring, and really hot, she slid both her finger down to the hole right below the bundle of nerves and felt where all her juices were coming from. She propped herself up on her pillows as she slipped just her middle finger in, knuckle deep. She knew she would be too small to fit both in at once so for now one would have to do.

As Hermione let her middle finger sit right there she used her left hand to start circling around her clit again. She felt a moan building up inside of her, and remembering she had put up a silence charm, she let it out. She could feel her spine getting tingly and her stomach kept clenching.

She slowly started to move her middle finger in and out of her core, curling her finger upward because she read it was supposed to make it feel even better. It was working. Her left hand started circling faster and harder as she pounded her hole with a dripping digit. Her head lolled against the headboard and she squeezed her eyes shut.

She felt a pressure building and it was so hard to keep going without just screaming her head off. She could tell her cheeks were red just by the heat she felt and her wrist was starting ache with the exertion, but she kept going. She needed to feel a release of pleasure that she knew was just around the corner. Bucking her hips, pressing her clit and finger fucking her hole she felt a wave of bliss rush over her.

Moaning like a whore she came in her hand, her sticky juices getting on her sheets a little, but Hermione didn't care. Her legs had shot out straight and they started twitching like a dying bug. Her heart was racing and she could feel her pulse directly at her center.

Finally knowing what it was like to orgasm, she slipped her finger out of the tight space and slipped her undies back on, though she knew they would get covered with her liquid. Content and slightly sleepy she rolled over and fell asleep, a smile on her face.

_*End Flashback*_

Fantasizing about that moment made Hermione horny all over again but she didn't want to get down and dirty with herself if anything was going to happen later. Plus, her parents were right downstairs. That would be gross.

She heard a light tapping on her window and saw her owl, Virgil, perched there, a rolled up note tied to his leg. She jumped from her bed to let him in, eager to hear the details of her birthday. She fed Virgil a treat and he hopped back to his perch, settling down and cleaning himself after his long flight.

Hermione untied the note and rolled it out to read. It was short and sweet, just like hers had been.

'_Mione,_

_I have got tonight all planned out, don't worry about it. I'll pick you up at your house at 6pm so be ready for it. Happy birthday._

_Ron_

She was slightly annoyed with the attitude he had given her, but her excitement made it less noticeable. Tonight was the night, she could feel it.

* * *

><p><em>AN: So I was going to put her first time into this chapter too but I decided not too. I may combine the two chapters in the future, but right now I like them better as separate chapters. Anyways, I hope you liked this. I know the dirty loveliness was short but it will get longer (*wink wink*). This is my first story and I was feeling horny, so there you go, my lusty story. I have chapter 2 mostly written at the moment, I just have to find a good spot to end it. I will prolly have it up tomorrow :) Please review, I need to know if people actually like this or if I should just start from scratch with this one. Thanks for reading. Love you guys!_

_~Lucy_


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